34
Mrs. Bluezette's Grammar Guide
your/you're, -ed
Mrs. B suspects you think all she does is pore over her grammar
books, but now and again she ventures out.
Her latest search for grammar gaffes took her to Gainesville, home
of the University of Florida.
There lies the source of today's grammar lesson: the sign on a tattoo
establishment.
"If you are drunk, on drugs, sick, pregnant, sunburned, barefoot,
dirty, smelly, a bum, under 18, broke, trying to sell me
something or otherwise obnoxious please come back when your
not."
"Your" should be YOU'RE, a contraction for "you are."
Kudos, however, to this Gatortown merchant who put an "-ed" on
"sunburn."
His or her fellow merchant around the corner had "toss" salad as a
choice on the menu.
By now, Mrs. B's students know that should be TOSSED salad and
ICED tea.
And in the event that Mrs. B's students think her old FASHIONED,
hear this.
Mrs. B is considering a tattoo: "Grammared Older Adult Babe."
That would be GOAB. (It's Mrs. B's understanding that the fewer
the letters, the less the pain.)
