the ranking phenomenon
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parently forgetting that it is the child, not themselves, who is applying to
college, some all but hijack the process.
"Parents write their kids' essays and even attempt to attend their inter-
views," says Marilee Jones, dean of admissions at the Massachusetts Insti-
tute of Technology (MIT). "They make excuses for their child's bad grades
and threaten to sue high school personnel who reveal any information per-
ceived to be potentially harmful to their child's chances of admission. As
dean of admissions, I see this type of behavior at least twice a week."
And when things go wrong and a rejection letter arrives, it's not clear
who is more upset. Jones recalls a letter she received from one father, just
three sentences long: "You rejected my son. He's devastated. See you in
court." Yet the very next day another letter arrived, this time from the son:
"Thank you for not admitting me to MIT. This is the best day of my life."
In this case, a happy ending for both the student and MIT (no word
on the father's prognosis). But these stories, in the end, do not reflect the
norm. For every parent who schedules his or her child's life with a stop-
watch and believes lawsuits are an integral part of the admissions process,
there are many other parents who are just the opposite. Indeed, Pamela
Lewis, president of Queens University in North Carolina, found that while
some students do believe their parents are overly involved, an equal num-
ber wanted more involvement and guidance.
In the end, stories of stress and micromanagement may not indicate
confidence among students and parents in the college admissions game,
but instead the opposite--tremendous insecurity and uncertainty. They're
led to believe that a great deal is at stake, but they don't know how to
proceed. Newspaper columnist Richard Reeve spoke for many parents try-
ing to help guide their teenagers through the maze of modern college
admissions. "It's not that the college entrance and acceptance process has
become so competitive and cumbersome that parents are lucky to retain
their sanity," he wrote. "It is that the process has become so irrational and
